My Other grade school years

My time at my other grade school was a dark period in my life and even though I only spent 2 years at this other school compared to 5 years at my first grade school, it seemed like an eternity and my life there was pure hell. Anytime someone transfers to a new school it can be difficult but I didn't think things would go as badly as they did for me. Even though I wasn't religious at the time, I always felt things like this happened for a reason but after my experience at this second school I no longer thought things happened for a reason. I questioned if there can even be a God!

My new school had a mixture of special education students and regular students but was my school districts designated place to send the worst of the special education students. Instead of spending 4 hours a day in special ed like my other school, I spent most of my school days in special ed. The school had two separate wings. one wing had grades 4 through 6 and the other wing had kindergarten through the third grade and the two special education classes. There was my class which appeared to be geared towards special education students who had a normal IQ and as my teacher put it we are "Mentally Handicapped" while the other class was geared towards people who had a low IQ and were considered "Mentally Retarded". I really felt out of place in my class and new school and for the first time saw myself as someone from another planet. I just didn't fit in and was different than my classmates in several ways that I cannot even explain. Most of my classmates were abused by their parents either emotionally or physically. Others had traumatic experiences happen in their family such as the death of a loved one, a parent diagnosed with cancer or a parent even dying from cancer. One student that I knew, I was quite sure was sexually abused by a parent or other family member. In addition to being like someone from a different planet, I really didn't fit in with these kids who were abused by their parents. There was one student who had a tough life and took out his anger on other people including teachers. The mainstream students didn't really consider us part of their class since we would spend only 1 or 2 classes with them then return to special ed. We would have desks in our other classrooms but the mainstream students would often steal pencils and other items from our desks since they figured we weren't really part of their class. Unlike my previous school, students here were less tolerant and wouldn't hesitate to punch you while you are walking down the hall minding your own business, harass you, and do anything to let you know that they don't like "retards". I immediately missed my first school and couldn't wait to go back but didn't realize that I wasn't going back. This is where I would spend the rest of my grade school years.

My special ed teacher decided that I couldn't handle my normal grade of schoolwork so I started doing 2nd grade work even though I was a 5th grader. I admit that I didn't do my homework which caused problems at my other school but didn't realize this would give teachers the message that I cannot handle my own grade of work. After finishing the sixth grade I was unable to divide which most sixth graders could easily do and learned a lot earlier than the sixth grade how to divide. I also missed out on English and almost every other class for my own grade level and when I did go to a class at my level, it was a class that didn't teach me anything or I didn't understand the class because I was so behind from not doing the coursework during the previous grades. Of course when I registered for Junior High School, I had to take Special Ed English and Math classes.

Like I mentioned, there are a lot of bad memories at this school. One of the worst incidents I encountered was when a girl found out I found her attractive but she didn't like me and made sure to let me know about it. One of the reasons I was sent to this second school was because I never had friends at recess at my first school. For the most part I didn't have friends but sometimes hung around with another Special Ed student named Trent who enjoyed getting into trouble. He was always up to some kind of mayhem and would do pranks such as smashing milk cartons on the playground, disobey teachers just to piss them off, and even walk into a womens restroom with 1st through 3rd grade girls in it which was really messed up. He was about the only friend I had in this second school. Some of the other bad memories is the first time in my life (and probably the only time) that someone punched me. I was in the restroom at a urinal on the other side of him when he suddenly punched me. Because I hang around with Trent, I was starting to be considered a troublemaker by teachers too. I can't forget the day that a teacher's aid punched me when I tried to ask if it was my turn to read. For some reason that day he was in a very bad mood and told us to keep our mouth's shut unless we are called upon to talk. I asked if it was my turn to read and he threw a punch right to the temple of my head. This was the first time in my life that I realized what an outcast I was and how people saw me as someone from another planet. It seems I gave them plenty of things to make fun of. I would wear my Boy Scout uniform to school because I was so proud to be a Boy Scout for some reason. In later years I would lose interest in Boy Scouts and never achieve the rank of Eagle Scout that I intended to achieve when I first joined. Our troop was a small troop of only a few people and dissolved so I ended up in a much larger troop where I was the outcast and since my scoutmaster insisted on 2 people in every tent, I ended up with another weird person who would drink maple syrup and treated me as if I was dumb and he was my teacher. The other members of my troop would meet in a tent and have a part but me and Chris were left in our own tent. It was a bummer to camp since I always ended up with Chris and was excluded from the other activities the rest of the troop did. Summer Camp really sucked in my new troop. I was made fun of in my other troop but still had at least some respect and was included in activities unlike my this new troop.